It's Fun to Stay at the YMCA

So at our YMCA you are randomly given a locker when you check in, a different locker each time. There are like 200 lockers in 6 different rows in the women's locker room. I tell you this because it leads to my question. How is it possible that EVERY SINGLE DAY I get assigned a locker in the row with the greatest quantity of naked people? Statistically this is an abberation. When I say naked people I am not talking 20 somethings that have showered after their workout so they can hurry off to their photo shoot. Oh no, these are OLD women who are taking the aquatic fitness classes. Skinny people, generally speaking, do not have to take aquatic fitness classes, as they are able to hold themselves up without the aid of liquid. This brings us to an new adjective, FAT. I just want to work out. Put my keys and sunglasses in a locker and head up to the Fitness Center. What I do not want to do is squeeze my way to my locker, which is invariably blocked by, you guessed it, an old, fat lady and politely blink at her until she loads up the dolly and gets her ass out of the way. I have accidentally touched people in my squeezing through attempts on several occasions. Let me tell you, it's hard to work out when you're nauseus. There's no way that the Village People had to deal with this.