Jaime v. Ashly, Round One
Today being Tuesday, Ash, Amy and I decided to hit up BYOB night at the movies, Spiderman 2 being the movie of choice. I thoroughly enjoyed this movie. However, my dear friend Ashly had some issues with this movie. I am here to state and refute her RETARDED argument. If you haven't seen the movie I'm sorry if I give away any pivotal plot points, I'll try my best not to.
Ashly Problem #1-The villian's name was Otto Octavius. He is given the nickname "Doc Ock". She was very concerned with this and didn't think it was a good name for a villian. Apparently "The Green Goblin" was uber clever. And really, like anyone would name their kid Peter Parker. How many times would that poor kid be asked how many pecks of pickled peppers he picked??
Ashly Problem #2-The artificial intelligence of the mechanical arms overtook Doc Ock's own brainpower and made him do bad things. She claimed this wasn't realistic. Yes, I'm sure that the makers of a movie called SPIDERMAN were really concerned with realism. Spiderman is, of course, based after a real man who shot spiderwebs out of his wrist, had an uncanny "spidey sense," superhuman strength, and unbelieveable acrobatic abilities. He just came up with the unfortunate name of "Arachnid Arnie" and never quite accomplished the level of fame he should have. Get real Ash! Doc Ock also accomplished nuclear fusion on a massive scale in an abandoned riverside warehouse but she had no problem with this.
Ashly Problem #3-Why would MJ leave her EXTREMELY hot (and I do concede that he was extremely hot) astronaut fiance on the alter to go be with Peter Parker/Spiderman? Uh, dude, he's Spiderman. Spiderman. What girl wouldn't want to be with Spiderman? Imagine what that guy can do with his hands, not to mention putting his spidey sense to good use. And seriously, there are lots of astronauts on the earth, relatively speaking, but only one Spiderman. One Spiderman with a delicious body and an extremely sexy hobby. Damn, I'm getting myself all worked up. I might have to go find Arachnid Arnie.
There are more arguments she had against this fantastic movie but I'm going to give her a chance to state her opinions before I tear them apart. Please stay tuned at ashlysmashly.blogspot.com. I would put a link in my profile but I'm too dumb to know how.
2 Comments:
Typo - Spiderman 2 not Superman 2 as you wrote.
I wouldn't ask Peter Parker how many pecks of pickled peppers he has picked because Peter Parker doesn't pick pecks of pickled peppers, Peter Piper does.
Sorry to nitpick.
And I would have to side with you. Movies based on comic books aren't gonna be realistic. Except for that guy i know who can't get hurt and has metal spikes that come out of his hands. Or maybe that guy who works at the newspaper who when he takes off his glasses and puts on a spandex suit you can't tell that he's the same guy who flies and can't go around a green glowing rock.
Jamie, you're simply the best. Very well articulated (as well as hilarious) arguments. At least Spidey didn't have to deal with the dreaded "Freeze Ray That Zapped Gotham" from that abomination of a film "Batman and Robin." Yeah, a freeze ray? That's a little out of hand.
Interesting note: you mentioned that Spider Man shoots webs out of his wrists. Of course you know that in the comics he had mechanical web shooters that Pete Parker pickled on his own. The makers of the movie were like, "Yeah, that's believable." and changed it. Very unlikely that Peter Parker was both crimefighter and pioneer in the shootable adhesives industry.
Personally, I can't wait for the eventual showdown between Spidey and his best nemisis, Venom... OK, I'm gonna stop there.
Nate
PS- Comics rule!
PSS- I'm still single.
PSSS- There may be a connection.
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